Fear

March 24, 2012


Today was a bitter sweet day filled with actual fear for me. The last day of the Open. The last workout that could help to put CFW in the top 30 and on the way to the Regional competition. However, I have been afraid of this workout since before I even knew what it was. Pullups... and not just regular pullups, chest to bar pullups. OH.MY.GOD. Just a few months ago I was hanging from the bar for dear life with a giant black band pulling with all my might to just get my chin up over the bar... now I have to get my chest to the bar. Yeah, right.

Thursday night I spent some of my time at the gym working on my kip and attempting chest to bars. I worked and I worked and with the help of R I was able to figure out a method to get myself through the WOD. That wasnt good enough for me though. I want to be a player in this "game" I want to contribute and I want to do all that I can. My head had to be in the right place and it just didnt feel like it was.

I typically stress out right before a WOD starts but when the clock starts I just let go of everything that I have been thinking and power through the workout. I know that the people at CFW have my back and will encourage me through the whole time. K was my judge (and she is a life saver, but you already know that) and Hubs decided to go at the same time as me. We got everything set and it was do or die time.

This... this was one of the most frustrating moments of all the WODs I have completed... even over the double under WODs. While working with R on Thursday, I decided to use an underhand grip for the pullups. This worked perfect for the first set of three. I had to let myself hang before pulling, as I used the lower bar and you of course are not allowed to use any sort of jump to boost up to the bar. The thrusters were no problem so I was back to the bar for sixes before I knew it. I struggled and double kipped through all six with lots of encouragement and rest time between attempts and again was back on the bar after the 9 thrusters... this is where it got frustrating.

It was like running towards a carrot dangling from a rope three feet in front of me... or running as fast as I could with a bungee chord pulling me back as I got closer to my target... My body said rest more between attempts and my mind said you dont have time to rest. Way to many failed attempts, way to much exerted energy. K and the rest of the crew were supportive and encouraging and when the time ran out I was just one rep away from completing the 9's.

Proud of myself... yes. As I said at the beginning, I just a few weeks ago I was using a band... three days ago I had never even attempted a chest to bar... and today I was doing chest to bars. I can not discount that, and I can not take that away from myself. I do feel as if towards the end I was starting to "figure out" what I was doing wrong... where I could improve and what I would do if I could attempt it again...

... and attempt it again in I will!! See ya tomorrow 12.5, the Opens arent over yet!! I will not let fear take over. I will conquer it.

WARMUP:
500m Row
3 Rounds
- 5 Ring Rows
- 5 Pushups
- 5 Inchworms
2 X 9 Fundamentals
 
WOD: 12.5
3 Thrusters (65lbs)
3 Chest to Bar Pullups
6 Thrusters (65lbs)
6 Chest to Bar Pullups
9 Thrusters (65lbs)
9 Chest to Bar Pullups
12 Thrusters (65lbs)
12 Chest to Bar Pullups
... and so on for 7 Minutes
your score is as far as you can get.
(My Score, 9 Thrusters and 8 Chest to Bar = 35)
 
.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

The 7's

Take That Burpees...

Gerald the Giraffe